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I never knew parents’ could disown their child, leave her alone on a path back from hell. I never knew one day could re-write my entire life, change my destiny, my goals, my desires. I couldn’t comprehend how a few individuals could take so much from me in just a few hours. It would be an understatement to say my life changed that day. In reality, my life ended that day.
It was a normal Monday morning, I woke up just early enough to have breakfast before I left for college. I can never forget the smile on my mother’s face that day, she was so jolly and excited because my graduation day was just a few days away. Her smile is engraved in my memory because I never was able to see it after that horrific day. I took the usual route, got on the bus and reached college within twenty minutes. I wish someone had told me to turn back, to take a leave that day, if only someone had predicted the future that day, I wouldn’t be a wounded soul today. I attended all my lectures and within a blink of an eye, it was already recess time. My friend’s and I usually walked back home together, but that day they had planned a get together. They insisted that I go along, however, I knew my parents wouldn’t approve of the sudden plan and so I tread towards home through my usual route. Why didn’t I just disobey them that one time? It would have hurt them far less.
As I was walking through the streets, I noticed from the side of my eye a group of young boys walking besides me. I didn’t pay much attention to it at first. However, after a while I realized that they were following me. My heart began pounding incredibly fast, and I started to put my little legs to work and began walking speedily. I was so nervous and scared, that I didn’t realize I took a wrong turn and ended up in a isolated street. There was almost nobody around that area but as I turned to go back to the busy street, I realized I was a little too late.
Also read: http://www.dawn.com/in-depth/silence-of-the-haunted/
They walked towards me with grins on their faces, it was almost as if though lions had caught and surrounded their prey. I gathered all my courage and walked towards them thinking they would get intimidated and move aside, I had never been so wrong. I walked right into the trap. One of the boys grabbed my stole and pulled it out of my neck. I began to scream for help and tried to run away but they formed a circle around me. They all grabbed me all at once, I couldn’t even comprehend what was happening. My panic attack went into overdrive and rather than retaliating, my body began submitting. What happened after is a blur.
As I opened my eyes, darkness surrounded me. I remember the first thought that came to my mind,
“This is it, this is the afterlife.”
But as I gained more consciousness, I realized I was alive, unfortunately. I picked up my stole, the only cloth that wasn’t torn. I covered myself with it and limped towards home. I couldn’t wait to fall into my mother’s arms and feel safe again, however, little did I know that those boys had taken that feeling with them. As soon as I reached home, I told my parents everything. I thought they would understand, that they would help me, comfort me and make me feel better. Unfortunately, they disowned me. They said they couldn’t face our relatives because of what had happened to me. They asked me to leave and never come back.
I had disgraced them, I brought shame on my family and I had to pay the price. Did I really?
Also read: http://arapesurvivorsblog.blogspot.com/
Rape is the only crime in which the victim pays for the crime. In societies such as Pakistan and India, people tend to blame the rape victim as the culprit for the crime. It is said that due to derogatory clothes of women in these areas, they are prone to get raped. Their parents and overall family member’s refuse to comfort and support them in such times. Instead, they begin to put blame of the entire act on the women, saying that it was their fault.
So even today, locked in a mental asylum, though I am mentally stable, but emotionally bruised, I repeat to myself every time I look in the mirror…
“It was my fault.”
Here’s a unique demonstration on how male domination crushes a woman’s life: